As a wedding photographer and as someone who has been Pinteresting wedding stuff since middle school (yes, really. not ashamed haha!), I’ve truly seen it all when it comes to weddings. The good, bad, and ugly.

I absolutely LOVED my wedding (I got married 6 months ago at Green Gables in San Marcos, San Diego, CA). I thought of absolutely EVERYTHING going into it. But… there were some things I wish I could change. There were LOTS that I was happy about, and I wanted to share them both here!

Here are 10 things I wish I did differently (or things that I’m SO happy I did) at my wedding.

Disclaimer: you do YOU at your wedding! No hate against things below; they’re just my opinion for myself and what I’ve seen work really well at weddings! I full support what you want to you on your day & no one should dictate what you should/n’t do 😀

#10 – Ditch anything that keeps me from the dance floor

This one is a little controversial haha! Things like bouquet/garter toss, a big cake cut, parent dances, long speeches (I wish we had done our speeches and parent dances at our rehearsal dinner), and first dance.

I wouldn’t get rid of the first dance completely though, because they’re so special!!! But I would’ve done it during cocktail hour in the courtyard at our venue OR I would’ve just done a private last dance instead with just my husband!

The whole day really does lead up to the dance floor, and with all the ceremonies and things you’re needed for, I was REALLY looking forward to NOT

#9 – No marriage license signing day-of

To me, is a huge waste of time and totally unnecessary to do on the day of. Yes, you need your witnesses and officiants sign this day-of, but you don’t. You and your spouse can take care of this when you pick up your license. I’m so glad we didn’t need to get pulled away from cocktail hour to sign it.

#8 – I would’ve hired a live band instead of a DJ

All the weddings that I’ve been to that have live bands are truly the BEST! They’re soooooo fun and keep the party going unlike any DJ could.

Here’s a live band I highly recommend. They played at a wedding I photographed recently, and they were incredible.

#7 – No wedding party photos

As y’all know, I LOVE photos. I think wedding photos are the best thing ever and I want to take every photo possible EVER!!! Buttttttttt… I am so glad we skipped the wedding party photos.

Don’t get me wrong, I really wanted photos with my bridesmaids, and that we got! Gavin got photos with his groomsmen, and it was perfect. But to save time and energy, we didn’t take photos of everyone together. Why?

Weddings can sometimes feel more like a photo shoot than a wedding, so I didn’t want to be burnt out before our ceremony even happened. It takes a long time to gather everyone, and let’s be real… I knew I wasn’t gonna hang those photos in my house or even post them.

This depends on the couple. I still wanted a photo with the groomsmen, so I still took a quick photo with them. I am SO glad I saved myself time and energy by skipping the big photos with both sides of our wedding party.

If you’re really close with your partner’s side, then just take a quick, casual photo with them instead of using up a bunch of time. Then, you have more time to chill out, take photos with your spouse, or enjoy cocktail hour!!!

#6 – Hire a planner

I HIGHLY recommend this. We didn’t have a planner but we had a day-of coordinator and she was great. It’s not a suggestion, but a necessity really! Family and friends shouldn’t be relied upon to know the ins and outs of the timeline, vendor coordination, catering coordination, etc.

#5 – Schedule a buffer in time for hair and makeup

Our makeup/hair artist ran long at my wedding, as they do at 80% of the weddings I’ve been to. It causes stress, rushed work, and it cuts into your photo time. No worries; this is a simple fix.

I would block in my timeline at least an hour between hair/makeup being DONE and when your photographer is gonna get there. Give yourself a buffer just in case getting ready takes longer, plus it’s never a bad thing to have extra time to pee, eat, organize things, relax, etc.

#4 – Ask your photographer about timing/locations

If you care about photos, I’d recommend asking your photographer about their recommendations for when to have your ceremony etc. They’re gonna make sure they find the best lighting & spots for you!

They will scout day-of for the best photo spots, but you can ask them in advance what time they think is best for things to happen. Sometimes venues don’t know… so just ask the expert!

#3 – Limit the amount of people getting ready with you

I am SO glad that I limited my bridesmaids number to 4 and only had 3 other people getting ready (mom, aunt, flower girl) in the same area as me (7 total, not including hair/makeup team). The wedding morning is CHAOS and it’s literally like getting ready for prom with that many people sharing mirrors and space. Imagine at least one suitcase per person spewed about, all surfaces covered, blasting music, hairspray everywhere, and people yelling from across the room. Unless your getting ready room is HUGE, I’d recommend limiting it. Even having 7 was a lot, but doable because we had a big space.

#2 – Open, bright bridal suite

Along with #3, I recommend having a big, open, bright space to get ready in. Hotels can sometimes be tight and dark (not the best for photos or the vibes). One of things I loved most about our venue was our getting ready space.

#1 – Tell Family BEFORE the wedding that they’re needed for family photos

This is a classic one. Most couples forget to tell their family beforehand where/when/who is needed for family photos. Often, these photos happen right after the ceremony is done, during cocktail hour. But what ends up happening is as soon as we’re ready to start, dad goes to the bathroom, brother rushes to the bar, grandma got lost, and aunt is stuck talking to people.

I am soooo glad that I made people aware that they need to stick around as soon as the ceremony concludes.

It made things run a lot faster and smoother. More time to enjoy!

ALSO!!! Remember to have a well thought out LIST of photos with exactly who you want in family photos. Give this to your photographer.

The real #1 — Remember, what matters is you’re getting married to your bff, and that you enjoy yourself. I hope you have the BEST day EVERRRRRR!!!! It’s gonna be AMAZING!!! 😀

What do you think? What would you do differently? Did any of these resonate with you?

My wedding photographer @forthewestandwildphoto